I can't fix it!
(story of my life)
I am sure those who read my blog (and bless you, I know there has been a lack of material lately) have seen my Instagram picture announcing that we are expecting another baby blessing again.
I have thought long and hard about sharing the news. Our initial fear of having two (under the age of two) has turned into joy and excitement. Our lives have been transformed by the love we have for Woody and feel blessed that our hearts are growing to have love for two now.
With our feelings of happiness, joy, and even a little fear of the unknown, I have had a hard time shaking a feeling of guilt. This is our second "surprise!" We have never tried to have a child, they have just happened....quite easily. Everywhere I look I see those longing for a child, and to shout the news from the rooftops seems equivalent to throwing daggers. We are fortunate to have one happy and healthy child, now two? Why are we so lucky?
(Believe me, it is not due to expert parenting. Woody jumped from a couch to a glass coffee table this weekend. Brooks and I watched him do it. And if my memory serves me right, neither of us punished him.)
However, I never want to look back and remember the fear or guilt of this baby. I only want to remember the joy and love I feel when I think of the little one growing inside me. I want to celebrate and rejoice in the miracle of becoming a mother again. And I never want to take for granted how blessed we are. (Despite morning sickness.)